One cross that the single man must bear is the lack of significance. By
this word I am referring to having meaning or importance. When Adam
sinned in Genesis 3, he lost his significance (in terms of his confidence
and his standing before God) and because of sin was forced to flee from
the presence of God. Sin had broken their fellowship, for God is holy. We
see on God’s part His faithfulness in providing a sacrifice and covering
for their sin through the slaying of an animal and through clothing them
by it. And so throughout history man has searched for significance.

There are several types of significance. The first and most prominent is
the action of sin, as everyone goes about seeking to become as gods. This
is common amongst unbelievers. Acts of vandalism, murders, and other
sinful acts are done to gain importance in the criminal ranks. There are
also the acts of immorality like unfaithfulness and fornication, that are
done not only to feed the flesh, but to bring temporal significance to
the carnal man. Usually when a man has gone so far down this pathway his
actions get worse and worse, for he must do greater deeds to continue or
to keep himself in the spotlight.

Another form of significance has its roots in materialism. Personal
possessions may become that which brings prestige and is something that
one can boast in. A new boat, a new car, and even little things can be
trumpeted and bring for a brief moment personal worth. Unfortunately
materialism usually turns into a race to keep up with the neighbor in
buying bigger and better things. There is no satisfaction in this
pursuit, and it will only lead to discontentment and great sadness. In
Matthew 6:19-21, Jesus says,

“Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon the earth, where moth and rust
spoils, and where thieves dig through and steal: but lay up for
yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust spoils, and
where thieves do not dig through nor steal: for where thy treasure is,
there will be also thy heart.”

Let us now look at some forms of significance that have a good side to
them. They would be things like a job or a hobby. Those things can bring
a worthwhile significance to our existence if kept in their proper place.
My job gives me an area of security in that I know what I shall be doing
on the days that I work. It’s also a form of discipline in that it
exercises the body and teaches us to be punctual in our dealings with
others. A hobby can also be good in that we have a goal or vision set
before us. In planning out a series of writings ahead of time, a vision
becomes established, and satisfaction comes when by God’s enabling power
that goal is reached.

“The sleep of the labouror is sweet, whether he has eaten little or much;
but the fullness of the rich doth not suffer him to sleep.” 
(Ecclesiastes 5:12)

Now another area of significance is marriage. I get a bit frustrated at
times with men who take their wives for granted. They treat them like an
old shoe, not realizing that God has given them something precious. When
my mother went home to be with the Lord, my father struggled with the
lack of significance in his life. Don’t think that God was not with him,
but nights alone and a weekend without someone to share it with is hard
to handle once you have had a good marriage. Many young people of today
know nothing about togetherness, intimacy, or the giving up of one’s
self-identity. May those of you who are married lead us by example and
come to realize what God has given you. 

Now for the single man, he may have a hobby and a job which gives some
significance to life, but there is still something lacking. It comes by
way of a close and intimate relationship. He is not married, so what now?
I Corinthians 7:33  says,

“...The unmarried cares for the things of the Lord, how he shall please
the Lord.”

This is where true significance lies, for in pleasing the Lord we will
find Him to be all sufficient. It was God who said to Paul, “My grace is
sufficient for thee; for My power is perfected in weakness.” Our
significance lies in the power of God, in the Creator of heaven and
earth, the blood of Jesus, and the quickening of this body to life by the
Holy Spirit.
        
Whether you are married or single there are blessings in Christ and once
you place your faith in the Lord Jesus those blessings are yours. Your
relationship to sin has been severed and you have been delivered from the
domain of darkness and translated into the Kingdom of God’s dear Son.  A
new relationship has begun and you are now part of the family of God, a
child of God, and one of God’s possessions. You are now related with the
Son and are complete in Him and have a secure foundation, a foundation
that cannot be moved.  Last but not least of all blessing and
significance is the Holy Spirit. A new life has been given and you are
now born again, complete in the Lord. There is comfort in that, for we
have a new standing in Christ and are heirs of salvation. 

Dear brother, if you are struggling with your singleness and the lack of
significance that seems to permeate your existence, then turn to the Lord
and seek Him. Make it your life goal to continue in His word, to be
taught by His Spirit, and to dedicate the works of your hands into His
keeping. In this way the single man has an advantage, for nothing hinders
him realizing his great need. We have all things in Christ and only need
to come to the blessed realization of what this means 

Surrender yourself to the Lord and look to Him, for His grace is
sufficient and He cares for you.

M. H. G.        


E-Mail Matthew H Goins